All women are brought up in what I like to call the ’stupid’ bubble. Almost as soon as puberty hits we’re taught about birth control. When the time comes for us to be sexually active then we want to be prepared beforehand. You don’t want to get an STD and you don’t want to become pregnant. It only takes once.

Later when you decide you want to have a child you realize just how silly some of that birth control part of protection was. Sure you’re happy you didn’t become a parent before you wanted to be but getting pregnant isn’t as easy as it sounds. All woman have as a very narrow time frame each cycle where we actually can become pregnant. Even then conditions have to be just right. If you do actually become pregnant many will miscarry. Pregnancies don’t always go as planned nor do deliveries.

The moral of the story is that bringing home a child, and especially a healthy one, really is a miracle.

I grew up in a very small town (population 2000 in my town – the whole area is under 16000) in northern Ontario right near the Manitoba border. The closest civilization to us was Winnipeg, 2 and a half hours away. Because of this obscurity we lack in Doctors. For this reason unless you are having a section an epidural isn’t even an option. I have had a child without any pain relief but not even having the option freaks me out.

My first taste that things don’t always go as planned came young. My cousin was 7 weeks old, my Aunt called my Mother in the middle of the night that G was peeing blood. He was immediately air lifted into Winnipeg’s Health Sciences Center. To this day I don’t know what the official diagnoses was but I know he had a heart defect and a very enlarged heart. If he made it through this initial part it was unlikely that he’d live past 2. He did survive and even grew up. He was always ill and lost his hearing over time. Tragically a few days before I first became a Mother, a 16 year old G was tired of being sick and took his own life with a hunting rifle.

I can’t begin to tell you how many women I know who have lost a pregnancy for various reasons. I even know a few who lost their child shortly after their birth. Even when I was born I terrified my parents. I’ve never been the picture of perfect health. Freak things such as my recent Gallbladder rupture have always happened to me. Shortly after my birth my Mother had to preform CPR on me as I stopped breathing. Even though I survived I am considered a SIDS baby. At 11 months I contracted Type B Bacterial (Spinal) Meningitis. I was alive by machines. Again I cheated death and luckily the only side effect from this is my brittle teeth due to the antibiotics I received then.

My youngest nephew (who turned 4 today) almost was lost and nearly took his mother. 26 hours into my sisters labour she started gushing blood. Her placenta had abrupted and they raced her into the OR, put her under anesthesia and saved the lives of them both. It is not a pretty story and was really touch and go for them both.

In the past few weeks I have been reminded yet again about what can go wrong. One friend delivered baby A 10 weeks too soon. He is stable right now thankfully. A virtual acquaintance lost her life because of an infection from her delivery and one of my best friends nearly lost hers too. She went to the hospital, overdue, with pre-eclampsia. They were about to deliver her but she went into labour on her own. 31 hours into her labour and 4 hours into pushing it was time for a section. Everything appeared to happen normally but T felt sick. They went to sew her up and she was pouring blood. They sent Dad out and put T to sleep. Her uterus tore open up the back. She was in surgery for 3 hours and lost more than half of her blood supply. They repaired her the best they could but her new son may be her only child. No one can say for sure if her uterus will hold if she has another child. They only way to know is by having another and praying it does. It’s too soon for her even make that decision but I do know she is in agony over the decision and she hasn’t even left the hospital yet.

I’m going to go hug my boys now (who had their own journeys coming into the world) and say a prayer for the one that got away.

Please say a little prayer for Baby A, T and their families as well as the family of C. Also say one for anyone else who may be needing one right now.